Tips for an Office Romance
Sometimes it just happens and there is nothing you can do about it. When you set your sights on that sweet piece of ass that just started working two doors down from your office, important considerations should be perused before you pounce. Go over a few of these tips for an office romance. Then decide if you can stomach the bullshit that comes with it.
Saunter Over To Human Resources
If your company does not offer some sort of handbook on what kind of behavior is expected of you, then make sure you find out. The human resources department should have a policy to pass on however, if it is a small workplace, then you may want to acquaint yourself with your particular state’s laws when it comes to office protocol. This includes dating a subordinate or even the boss. These two missteps can not only get you fired, they can possibly hold some ugly legal ramifications. Can you say, ‘sexual harassment’? Either way get the rules of the game before you play.
Hide It As Long As You Can
Let’s face it humans are humans and the reason most stop to look at a car wreck is to give them something to talk about. Don’t be that car wreck for everyone to ogle. Stay friendly and cordial with your office romance keeping it on the down low as long as you can. This will accomplish two things:
1. Jealous co-workers will not be able to use your romance against you when it comes to your work performance and/or potential promotion.
2. You will be so hot for each other by the time you leave the office you may not be able to make it home without pulling over and having crazy car sex.
Do You Really Want To Shit Where You Eat?
Most romances come with that messy thing called ‘life’. Office romances are no different. It is inevitable that the two of you will end up locking horns sooner or later and then going to work can be a real downer. Once you see that smoking babe walking around in her tight skirt, high heels and bulging top, try to catapult yourself into the future:
• You flirt
• You go through weeks of coy playfulness
• You go out for a drink
• You have wallpaper tearing sex
• You steal away into a corner at work and make-out
• You spend weeks on cloud nine
• You have your first fight
• You have your second, third, fourth fight
• You can’t stand the sight of her
• You break-up
• You see her every day, flirting and canoodling with the next guy
• You hate your life
It is a slippery slope when considering tips for an office romance. Few are ever successful and whether they are or aren’t, it often requires that one of you find another job.